My blog is over one year old now! Its birthday was October 27, but I was out of town on that date, so the celebratory post is a little late.
I mark the occasion with a hodgepodge retrospective. In my first post, I explain why I chose the name The Mirth of Despair. I mention that I wanted to associate my real-life identity with this blog. Although the blog has existed for a year now, I don’t think I’m ready for that step yet.
For the first few months, I struggled with my blog’s voice. My approach seemed rather scattered. Was it a purely personal blog? Was it an informational blog that pulled from personal experiences? Was it a blog for me to explore writing techniques? Was I talking about random ideas and beliefs? It felt like my voice was unstable, my posts all over the place.
But as time passed, I grew more comfortable. I’ve decided that, for the most part, Mirth is a mental health diary. As such, it’s not a place for me to discuss my daily life, but rather a place for me to discuss my mental health in both general and personal terms. So what if I occasionally veer into other topics? So what if I write a few fictional works? I think everything here is related somehow. It’s an expression of myself, and my experiences and mental health have shaped both my thoughts and my creative writing.
A few selected highlights:
I still like the underlying idea of Channeling Negativity into Creativity, although I think I could write a better post than the original one.
If you’ve ever read my blog for any substantial length of time, you’ve probably noticed that I refer to my “big break.” This post gives particulars about the big break. The wound is still raw, even after three years, and that characteristic comes out in the post.
In this post, I talk about the closest I ever came to a suicide attempt.
Stalemate is probably my favorite creative writing post, mainly because it contains the phrase “envelop me in amber.” This is a phrase I’ve had in my head for at least two years.
Once Upon a Time marks the occasion of my 100th post.
Lately, I’ve been discussing my fall into darkness. I think the darkness is something that’s always been with me. Inexpressible mentions the same darkness, and while perusing my posts, I was surprised to discover earlier discussion about the abyssal darkness.
I think the recent post X-Ray is a glimpse into the recesses of my soul.
A Friday Fictioneers post, Fairy Dust, has received Mirth‘s most amount of likes.
However, out of everything I’ve written, The Blogging Community, a Canvas post, has received the most amount of likes.
Search Term Bonanza is the obligatory search-term post.
A few search terms that have landed on my blog since that post include:
“do u have anxiety if u feel like cant make it around in the supermarket or malls or other places like anxious”–Sounds like it to me–feeling anxious would mean you have some anxiety.
“christian bale face shape”–I don’t even know. How would one describe the shape of Christian Bale’s face? Is it a unique shape? Because I’ve never noticed.
“i am a loner, but don’t want my kids to be”–What’s wrong with having children who are loners? If they seem to enjoy alone time, why not let them have it?
“jamie bamber glasses”–Jamie Bamber has worn glasses at some point? You want a picture of that?
“why people try to change loners”–Because we live in a society that puts a premium on extroversion and unjustly discriminates against loners.
“i think i have adhd but i also feel like a perfectionist sometimes..” What does being a perfectionist have to do with ADHD?
“‘notify me when new comments are added’ wedding ideas”–Sorry, I don’t have any wedding ideas for you. You might want to, you know, go to a website that specializes in weddings. There might periodically be new comments about them on such a website.
“will paul mcgann and david tennant return as the doctor”–Wouldn’t that be awesome?!
“how to become a loner at work”–Huh? Are your coworkers so annoying that you want them to leave you alone? Can’t say I blame you.
“anything wrong with being intellectual”–No. Please be intellectual! We’ve got enough dumb people as it is.
“cereal boxes in real life”–As opposed to cereal boxes in one’s imaginary life?
“david tennant superman”–David Tennant as Superman?! Sounds fantastic!
“psychiatrist has diagnosed me with avoidant personality but it is not right”–You might want to talk to your psychiatrist about that rather than consulting the Internet.
“can you have avoidance personality without narcism”–I would think having avoidant personality disorder would in most cases preclude narcissism.
“afraid if i confide to much it will be used against me”–Me, too, searcher. Me, too.
“i think i have adhd but i don’t think it’s real”–If you don’t believe ADHD is real, then why would you think you have it? Methinks you actually believe it’s real.
“my boyfriend is musically gifted is that why he is socially awkward”–Not everyone who’s musically gifted is socially awkward, so probably not. It could possibly be a contributing factor, though.
And of course, as always, various iterations of “is there anything wrong with being a loner?” are the most frequent search terms by far, and I have this post to thank for that. With that search term in mind, I wrote a sequel, Is There Anything Wrong with Being a Loner? (Part II).
Over the past year, I’ve gotten more from the blogging community than I ever could’ve imagined. Of course I wanted readers; otherwise, I would’ve started a private blog. But I didn’t expect to forge wonderful friendships with fellow bloggers.
I’ve become part of A Canvas of the Minds, a fabulous blog with various perspectives on mental health. On a lark, I started a choose-your-own-adventure blog, A Circus at the End of the World. On behalf of the latter, I even joined a blogroll contest set up by Clown, Le, which in its own way also helped me more than I could’ve ever imagined.
I joined others in blogging about World Suicide Prevention Day. I became part of Lulu‘s Blog for Mental Health 2012 project.
And I’ve had still more glorious and rewarding adventures on my blogging journey, but I’ve gone on long enough, haven’t I?
I end with thanks, because without you, fellow comrades in blogs, my blog wouldn’t be what it has become.